


It's (not) Alright

by MollieExhumed



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Multi, Post-Hogwarts, Pre-War, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-18 04:27:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8149105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MollieExhumed/pseuds/MollieExhumed
Summary: An unfortunate accident occurs during a full moon.





	

Remus flinched back from the blinding lights on the ceiling. His entire body felt stiff and sore, more so than usual, and Remus could feel scratches and bruises littering his body. Remus hadn't woken up in so much pain since before James, Sirius, and Peter had become animagi. Remus raised his right hand to clutch his forehead, he felt the shallow cuts on his face burn when they came in contact with the oils of his sweaty palm.

The previous night had started off routinely, he had eaten early and headed down to the cellar of Lily and James’s home as the sun began to set. The cellar was a decent size and mostly empty with the exception of an old, faded rug and worn couch that had come with the house. It was charmed to keep Remus contained in the cellar as well as muffle his screams and the animalistic noises Moony made after the transformation. Typically Sirius would join him in the cellar as Padfoot after the full moon had risen, he would be alone because Prongs couldn't fit through the door and Peter was afraid of being in such an enclosed space with Moony. Throughout the night Lily, James, and Peter would take turns sitting by the door at the top of the cellar to ensure nothing went wrong. It was a decent system and there hadn't been any incidents since they graduated. So Remus couldn't help but wonder what had happened to make him feel so torn apart.

“ Oh! You’re awake,” Lily said from the doorway of the guest room, pulling Remus from his thoughts, “here, let me patch you up.”

Lily sauntered over to Remus’s bedside and gently grabbed Remus’s face to wipe away the quickly drying blood that had dribbled out of his wounds. Now that she was closer to him, Remus could see that Lily was sporting a badly split lip and a few bruises along her jaw and cheekbones. A foreboding feeling of dread slowly pooled in Remus’s stomach as he clenched his jaw in frustration.

“ Patch me up? What about you?” Remus demanded. “Lily, what happened, I can’t remember anything.”

Lily’s emerald eyes filled with sympathy as she brought her fingers to her injured lip. She looked down at Remus sadly.

“ I’m fine Remus, really,” Lily insisted as she tried in vain to school her emotions, “it’s not your fault anyway, so don't worry about it right now, we’ll figure everything out once you and— once you're feeling better.”

Remus knew as soon as she stumbled over her words that Lily was hiding something from him. He clenched his eyes shut as his hands balled into tight fists.

“ How badly are they hurt?” Remus breathed out a harsh whisper.

Remus could hear Lily shifting in discomfort beside him. Heavy silence fell between the two of them as Lily tried to find her words and Remus tried to school all of the guilt, anger, and pain that he was feeling at the thought of hurting someone he loved.

“ James took Sirius to the hospital this morning,” Lily whispered into the cold silence the room had taken.

Remus choked on a sob and his eyes stung, bile crept up his throat and Remus slapped a hand over his mouth desperately. Lily grabbed his shoulder and slowly turned him on his side so that his head hung over the bed and above a bin that she had placed on the floor. Remus’s cuts, bruises, and sore muscles protested the movement.

All Remus could feel was pain as he emptied his stomach into the bin. Even when there was nothing left he continued to dry heave until Lily was able to calm him down.

“ I’m so sorry,” Lily spoke softy as she rubbed Remus’s back, “ we tried to get to you before anything happened, I’m so sorry Remus.”

When he’d calmed down, Lily maneuvered Remus’s head rested in her lap, she ran her fingers through his hair comfortingly as tears trickled down his face. He didn't understand why _Lily_ was apologizing, it was his own fault that his best friend was injured so badly he had to be brought to the hospital, not Lily’s, not James’s, not Peter’s, _his_. He was the monster who couldn't control himself enough not to hurt the people he loved even when those people did everything they could to make this curse easier on him.

_He didn't deserve them._

Remus was overcome with exhaustion and was soon asleep in Lily’s lap as she continued to run her hands through his oily hair.

* * *

 

When Remus regained consciousness he was greeted with the disfigured face of his best friend.

“Hey Remus,” Sirius greeted with a tired grin. Remus took in Sirius’s appearance with horror, bruises littered his visible skin, three slashes were cut into his right cheek and another from the corner of his right eye down to the middle of his nose, his lip was stitched at the corner and there was a deep cut on his chin, close to his mouth. Remus felt sick all over at the sight of Sirius’s face.

“O-Oh God,” Remus gasped, “I-I, I’m so sorry, I can’t remember, oh _Merlin what have I done?”_

Sirius leaned forward and rested his cheek on his fist, effectively hiding almost half of his face and pulled his sweater up closer his neck. His long hair fell into his face like a wavy black curtain and he raised his chilling silver eyes to meet Remus’s.

“ It’s not a big deal Moony,” Sirius shrugged with a half smile, “I’m fine, really.”

Remus stared at Sirius silently, self-loathing consuming all of his thoughts. His chest tightened with grief as he remained speechless and overcome with guilt in the face of what he’d done.

Sirius shifted uncomfortably under the weight of Remus’s stare and glanced down at the floor, “Stop looking at me like that. It’s not your fault.”

Remus felt all of his grief immediately erupt into rage, “ What do you mean it wasn't my fault? This isn't a game, Sirius, you have no idea what it’s like to have no control of yourself! To hurt people and have no recollection of doing it! To turn into some monster and have to the face the consequences of actions that aren't your own! I don't know what happened Sirius, but regardless it’s my fault you look like that. My hands are the ones that put all those marks on your face. It’s my own— ”

“ _Stop,_ ” Sirius ordered, “ you said it yourself, your actions aren't your own, it was my own damn fault for being careless, now stop blaming yourself right now. It happened. Nothing anyone can do to change that, now lets move on.”

Remus stared at Sirius incredulously, “You honestly think that I can just move past this Sirius?”

“I’ll heal up in a few weeks time, besides I don't really mind Moony, I kind of enjoy the burning sensation,” Sirius smiled jokingly, “ and I’m going to have some wicked scars.”

Remus felt his lips twitch into a half-hearted smile before he noticed something in Sirius’s mouth. Remus felt is heart sink  down to his feet. Sirius had _fangs_. Not large ones but they were noticeable if you knew what to look for. And Remus knew what to look for, intimately.

“ _No_ ,” Remus choked out.

Sirius wrinkled his eyebrows in confusion before the realization hit. Sirius paled dramatically and snapped his jaw shut, looking regretful and apologetic.

“ No, no no no,” Remus repeated shaking his head as he cradled it in his hands.

“Remus, I’m so _sorry_ ,” Sirius said. Remus raised his head and met Sirius’s eyes. Sirius looked so _guilty_ , Remus couldn't take it.

“ _You’re_ sorry?” Remus asked in disbelief. “Sirius, I _bit_ you, why the bloody hell are _you_ sorry?”

Sirius looked down at his hands and his face scrunched up painfully, “ I was reckless Moony, it’s my own fault. I’m so sorry I put you in this position.”

Remus stared at his friend in disbelief, how had Sirius managed to turn this around on himself. Remus had bitten him and Sirius was making it sound like it was his own fault. Remus sighed heavily, collecting himself so he would be able to have a ration conversation.

“ Sirius, what happened? I need to know,” Remus insisted.

Sirius bit his lip before nodding in agreement.

“ It started out like it usually does, the moon rose and your screaming started, James and I waited at the door for the screaming to stop and when it did I shifted into Padfoot and James opened the door to let me down,” Sirius explained slowly, almost as though it pained him to say the words, “and long story short Moony wasn't as happy to see me as he usually is.”

Remus huffed out a sad sigh and hung his head, “Sirius as much as I don't want to know, I need the whole story.”

Sirius bit his lip and gave Remus a pained expression, “I don't need you feeling guilty about things that you cant change, it happened and there’s no going back, you don't need to know how it happened.”

“Sirius please,” Remus pleaded with an intense expression.

Sirius inhaled slowly and shut his eyes tightly, “Moony was clearly on edge when I got down the stairs, but I thought maybe I could cheer him up if I played with him a bit, but as soon as I pounced he attacked me, I fought back obviously but we both know Padfoot’s no match for Moony. I managed to get on Moony’s back and held onto his scruff while he tried to buck me off, when he couldn't manage it he stopped thrashing about and I relaxed my grip a little bit. It happened really quickly, but Moony slammed me against the wall, I hit my head pretty hard and got really dizzy so I fell off of his back. He grabbed Padfoot’s scruff and slammed me against the wall I don't even know how many times. Then I passed out. I guess I wasn't able to maintain Padfoot’s form while unconscious, so when woke up in the hospital with James he told me he’d found me in my human form and with a bite on my neck.”

Sirius tentatively opened his eyes, waiting for Remus’s reaction. The werewolf was clenching his fists tightly to his sides and his head was hung low. Sirius knew he shouldn't have told Remus what happened but now he regretted it even more, he never wanted to cause Remus so much pain.

“Remus?” Sirius asked in a soft, unsure voice, Remus’s heart ached to comfort him.

“Sirius,” Remus sighed and relaxed out of his position to grab Sirius and pull him close to his chest. Sirius nuzzled into Remus’s neck and wrapped his arms around him as Remus began running gentle fingers through Sirius’s long curls. Sirius breathed deeply, taking in Remus’s scent which was simultaneously familiar to him and foreign to his overloaded senses because there seemed to be much more to it now.

“I’m sorry Sirius, I never wanted this to happen,” Remus whispered.

“It’s okay Moony, it was an accident,” Sirius murmured into his collarbone.

“It isn't okay Pads, it isn’t,” Remus insisted pulling Sirius further into his embrace.

“No,” Sirius replied thoughtfully, “but it’ll get better.” 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed this little story, it's supposed to be a one shot but if you want more let me know! I think I could write a few more one shots continuing the story.


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